Resources

Though I write this blog for my own comfort and to communicate with friends and family, I have been learning that other people have come across it when searching for information after receiving a fatal diagnosis for their unborn child or after experiencing a loss.  I would like to list the resources I found most helpful here for those who need them.  They may also be helpful to my own friends and family as they try to cope with their own grief or understand how to help Joe and I.


Websites:

All That Love Can Do
 -This blog was very helpful in helping Joe and I plan for memory making with Mira and in finding a community of other families that have carried babies to term despite a fatal diagnosis.  There is also "For Friends and Family" section with some good advice and perspective.

Still Standing and Still Mothers
-Both these communities have been helpful to read post from other mothers and feel less alone.

Sufficient Grace Ministries
-This organization's site has some great information on it.  They also provided us with a comfort package that we really appreciated, especially their comfort bear and Dreams of You book.

Still Birth Day
-This site is packed with information.  Everything from how to plan a funeral to what to say to a loss parent to how to make memories with your baby.  (They have a very detailed Friends and Family section also https://stillbirthday.wordpress.com/familyfriends/)

Books for Parents (and their Supporters): 

Gone Too Soon by Serri Devashrayee Wittwer
I appreciated the the information in this book targets toward father's and grandparents' grief as well as the sections on how to help those who are grieving and tools for grieving parents.  There is a section on how the doctrine of the Latter Day Saints Church fits into infant loss, which does not aline with my beliefs, but I still found the overall book valuable.

to linger on hot coals: collected poetic works from grieving women writers by Stephanie Paige Cole and Catherine Bayly
Poems written by grieving women.  Beautiful writing and helpful to feel less alone.

A 31 day devotional that I found helpful in getting through the first month after loss.  I believe it would be helpful at any stage though.

Loved Baby: 31 Devotions Helping You Grieve and Cherish Your Child after Pregnancy Loss by Sarah Philpott
Another devotional, I really liked this one and go back to re-read several of the devotions on my hardest days.  Sarah writes with a very real honesty and does not sugar coat anything.

I Will Carry You: The Sacred Dance of Grief and Joy by Angie Smith
Angie Smith's story of carrying her daughter to term with a fatal diagnosis and how her relationship with God helped her.

A Gift of Time: Continuing Your Pregnancy When Your Baby's Life Is Expected to Be Brief by Amy Kuebelbeck
A straight-forward guide with factual information on the grieving during pregnancy and after infant loss and all the decisions you will face.  Includes lots of quotes and stories for different parents with different perspectives.

Empty Cradle, Broken Heart: Surviving the Death of Your Baby by Deborah L. Davis
A guide to pregnancy and infant loss.  This book is very detailed and like A Gift of Time includes lots of quotes and stories from a variety of parents.

Saying Goodby: A Personal Story of Baby Loss by Zoe Clark-Coates
Zoe's personal story of loss and creating an infant loss organization plus 90 days of inspirational readings.

Books to Read to Baby:

We read books to our daughter while I was pregnant and light her candle and read to her on special occasions as she listens from Heaven.  These are a few of our favorites:

Guess How Much I Love You by Sam McBratney
I've Loved You Since Forever by Hoda Kotb
The Crippled Lamb by Max Lucado
Heaven is for Real for Kids by Todd Burpo
Wherever You Are, My Love Will Find You by Nancy Tillman
I'd Know You Anywhere, My Love by Nancy Tillman
You're Here for a Reason by Nancy Tillman
The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein

Books for Living Children:

These are books we have donated in Mira's name to be given to living children (siblings mostly, but it could be cousins or other family members or close friends) to help process the loss.  I enjoyed reading a lot of them myself, especially "A Hug From Heaven."

Heaven is for Real for Kids by Todd Burpo
We Were Gonna Have a Baby, But We Had an Angel Instead by Pat Schwiebert
Tear Soup by Chuck DeKlyen and Pat Schwiebert
A Hug From Heaven by Anna Whiston-Donaldson
Where Are You? A Child's Book About Loss by Laura Olivieri

Songs

Both during my pregnancy and since Mira has passed, I found listening to music so therapeutic. These are some of the songs I connected with most (I know, its a long list, but I had trouble narrowing it down to these!):

  • Winter Bear by Coby Grant
  • Small Bump by Ed Sheeran
  • Climbing Clouds by Jetty Rae
  • Held by Natalie Grant
  • Photograph by Ed Sheeran
  • Hold My Hand by The Fray
  • Keep On Wanting by The Fray
  • I Dare You by Shinedown
  • Wonderwall by Oasis
  • Grace by Kate Havnevik
  • Hear You Me by Jimmy Eat World
  • Only One by Yellowcard
  • I Will Carry You by Selah
  • See You Again by Carrie Underwood
  • How Can I Help You to Day Goodbye by Patty Loveless
  • Make This Go On Forever by Snow Patrol
  • Unsteady by X Ambassadors
  • Break on Me by Keith Urban
  • Who You'd Be Today by Kenny Chesney
  • Gone Too Soon by Daughtry
  • Beam Me Up by P!nk
  • You Raise Me Up by Josh Groban
  • Ronan by Taylor Swift
  • Safe & Sound by Taylor Swift
  • Say Something by A Great Big World
  • We'll Be a Dream by We the Kings
  • Kerosene by Jetty Rae
  • Be Still by The Fray
  • God, Your Momma, and Me by Florida Georgia Line 
  • How He Loves by David Crowder Band
  • Through Heaven's Eyes by Brian Stokes Mitchell
  • No Longer Slaves by Bethel Music
  • You Make Me Brave by Bethel Music
  • The Book of Love by Peter Gabriel
  • Humble and Kind by Tim McGraw
  • Run by Snow Patrol
  • How Do You Fall in Love by Alabama
  • You'll Be There by George Straight
  • You'll Be in My Heart by Phil Collins
  • Just a Dream by Carrie Underwood
  • Keep Breathing by Ingrid Michaelson
  • Please Just Take These Photos From My Hands by Snow Patrol
  • The Resolution by Jack's Mannequin
  • Scratch by Kendall Payne

No comments:

Post a Comment